February 2009
26 posts
3 tags
YOU KNOW YOU'RE BLONDE IF...
blondie: Hi do you have anything we can dance to?
steve: can't you dance to this? (while playing James Brown - Papa's Got A Brand New Bag)
blonde: me and my friends don't dance to this country music.
steve: but it's James Brown!
blondie: (looks confused)
steve: have you never heard of James Brown?
blondie: I've heard of Bobby Brown
(thanks to www.stevenlayton.com)
2 tags
HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW OF BOB MARLEY?
dude: do you have any reggae?
dj cam-one: [bob marley is playing] uhh...isn't this reggae?
dude: well...how about reggae that I know?
1 tag
“can you play “I Can’t Live” by Mariah Carey?”
– a drunk DUDE
2 tags
MORE FUNKY THAN JAMES BROWN
Girl: [Whilst I'm playing James Brown] "Mate, have you got anything a bit more funky?"
Me: "More funky than James Brown?!"
Girl: [Looking confused]. "Yeah, you know some thing more ... " [makes odd swinging gesture with arm as if dancing to bad house music]
Me: [Looking confused]. "Does that mean house music?"
Girl: "Yeah, that would be good."
Me: "I'm not a juke box."
(via Chris Read, UK - www.myspace.com/chrisreadsubstance)
A REQUEST TO MAKE A SONG REQUEST BUT I DON'T KNOW...
Dude: Can I make a request?
Nak: yeah, sure...
Dude: I don't know...What should i request?
Nak: ...............
MAKE ME DANCE
girl: Hi, make me dance.
Cmish: um...just pretend your one of the 20 people dancing behind you.
girl: make me dance
Cmish: sorry, no requests
2 tags
“can you play He Wasn’t Man Enough by Toni Braxton?”
– @ a wedding
1 tag
MICKEY AVALON
white girl from LA: do you have any mickey avalon?
me: uhh. which song?
girl: 'my dick;
me: haha. no. sorry
girl: please? I really really want to hear mickey avalon
me: did you know he was a male prostitute before he become a quasi-hipster LA rapper?
girl: I love Mickey Avalon!
me: why in the world do you love him so much? did you hook up with him one time and he broke your heart?
girl: no. he just sold me some crack one time.
me: woah
1 tag
“this party is dead…you need to play some BeeGees”
– an old dude
3 tags
“do you have any Biggie?”
– right after I played “Kick In the Door”…by Biggie
1 tag
“hey we just got in from idaho and it’s my brother’s bday. can you...”
1 tag
“pat benatar please”
1 tag
“can you play that ‘put it in my mouth’ song?”
1 buck
a chick offered me 1 dollar to play a song last night. I said no. then she offered me 3.
1 tag
2 tags
“can you play some hip-hop?”
– while I’m playing hip-hop
“hi. my friend just got engaged so can you play the chicken dance song?”
2 tags
DOUBLE SINGLE LADIES
girl: can you play that beyonce song "put a ring on it"?
me: phaw. ok. (I play it)
same girl (15mins later): can you play that beyonce song again?
me: I just played it!
girl: but my friend just got here and she didn't hear it!
2 tags
“uhh…people can’t dance to hip-hop”
– Central High School 1997
2 tags
that new kanye joint
Crazy popped collar dude: Yo... can you play that new Kanye joint?
Me: I don't have it (actually I did but didn't want to play it... I turn to grab a record and...)
Crazy popped collar dude: Here... play it off this (and hands me his iPod nano)
1 tag
“Hi, it’s my friend’s birthday, and she’d really like to hear...”
2 tags
“Can you play Kelis’ I Hate You So Much Right Now?!?!”
– at a wedding
2 tags
“Do u have that new Skee-lo song?”
– 2009
1 tag
“Do you have anything dancy? Something like Michael Bolton?”
– idiot…